This sticker was seen on a system map in the 12th St. Oakland City Center BART stop yesterday morning. :)

As the woman in line in front of me said, “That’s the most Politically Correct fish I’ve ever seen!” They had so many attributes to give this fish, they could barely fit them all on the sign. All the other seafood had 4 lines at most.

Also, as the man behind me in line said, “At first I thought it said low density penis.”

Ah, California. I love you so. (spotted at Berkeley Bowl)

Every day I come up with at least one new idea to post on here, but they’ve all ended up in a list on my phone, waiting for me to find my confidence and security again now that I live in the Real World.

For the first time in my life I’m free to live exactly as I want to, and there are so many things I want to write about: Feminist things, like how fucking ridiculous it is that I have to scrape all the hair off my legs to feel comfortable wearing shorts in public; Tech things, like my totally hack-y but rather brilliant method for theming Disqus comments; Personal things, like my struggle to accept & deal with my growing weight and the denial that was so ingrained I kept buying new pants that were so too-small they actually hurt me; Photography things, like the schemes I have for the SF skyline I pass every day on the way to work; Work things, like all the awesome projects we’re making happen at Hattery.

Not to mention my new kitty, who is fluffy and beautiful and brave and currently biting my toes. (that’s not her in the picture, btw. That’s a co-worker’s dog.)

I’ve been getting angry at myself a lot lately – for not posting here, for canceling social events at the last minute, for not exploring my neighborhood or making new friends – but watching my cat these past couple days, I’ve realized it’s ok for me to be not ready yet. Maybe some other people in my situation would be out there living it up already, but if I need a couple months to hide under the stairs and sometimes hiss at the person who brings my food bowl, well, that’s just what I’m going to do. Occasionally, when I’m feeling confident enough, I’ll venture out and chase shiny toys around or explore all the nooks of my new habitat, but I’m not going to let myself feel guilty for needing to spend time alone and in a safe place.

Perhaps this is a partial answer to #5 on my life list – do what you need to do to feel safe and happy.

1. Complete MIT degree
2. Get a job
3. Find an apartment
4. Acquire cats, 2 (halfway complete)
5. ???
6. Happiness!

(photo credit to the talented James Buyayo)

May’s photo was not taken by me, but by my friend Aki. Bravo to Aki. :)

Now, the exciting part! I present to you: my new home!

I ended up in Oakland instead of the city, but I lurve lurve lurve my place even though I have a commute. It’s large, exactly the style I wanted, and, perhaps most importantly, affordable. :p It’s got a bit more furniture in it now than you see here, but it’s still coming together slowly, piece by piece. At least I have a mattress now – for the first 4 days I was sleeping on a pile of dirty clothes on the floor, which, as I’m sure you can imagine, is not comfortable.

1. Complete MIT degree
2. Get a job
3. Find an apartment
4. Acquire cats (2)
5. ???
6. Happiness!

3 down! I’m planning on getting the cats around the end of May, but I’m guessing it’s going to be that 5th step that’s the hardest.

(fun fact: my microwave, which you can see in the back of the kitchen above, is exactly the same model that’s in the 4th floor kitchen of wilg. :p small world!)

I think you won’t be disappointed by the real April model though – I wasn’t joking about placing my favorites in my birthday month. Tattoos and scars and bondage, oh my! ;)

Btw, you should all be very very glad I went the Iron Man route with the faux calendar month. My first idea was to use a picture of a hairy fat guy in a thong. :p